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Today's stories [9.17.09]

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Jack Benny swears that one evening when he was invited to play for the 
President, a guard stopped outside the White House gate and asked, 
"Whatcha got in that case, Mr. Benny?"

Benny answered solemnly, "A machine gun."

With equal solemnity, the guard nodded. "Enter, friend. I was afraid for a 
minute it was your violin!" 


Lully is one of our favorite 16th-century composers, who wrote music for 
the king of France.

While rehearsing the musicians, he got too serious beating time with his
staff, and drove it right through his foot. He died of infection.


Toward the end of their senior year in high school, students were required 
to take a CPR course. The classes used the well known mannequin victim, 
Rescue Anne, to practice. 

Rescue Anne was legless to allow for storage in a carrying case. 

The class went off in groups to practice. As instructed, one of the 
students gently shook the doll and asked "Are you all right?" He then put 
his ear over the mannequin's mouth to listen for breathing. 

Suddenly, the student turned to the instructor and exclaimed, "She says 
she can't feel her legs!"


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