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Today's quotes [9.6.09]

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"| <- You must be smarter than this stick to ride the Internet"
                        -- Mike Handler, paraphrased from Bev White


I can't believe it happened.  The other day I jogged backward and put on 
eight pounds!


Eat less fresh food. Eat more things containing preservatives.
Preservatives are called preservatives because they help you live longer.


* My homework is like a juicy steak -- rarely done.


I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the
   -- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that
   he failed to pay his taxes.


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