Today's poems [9.8.09]
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The nephew of one of the czars
Used to suck off Rasputin at Yars,
Till the peasants revolted,
The royal family bolted -
Now they're under the sickle and stars.
There was a young man of Madras
Who was fucking a girl in the grass,
But the tropical sun
Spoiled half of his fun
By singeing the hair off his ass.
There was a young lady named Alice,
Who used dynamite for a phallus.
They found her vagina
In North Carolina,
And part of her asshole in Dallas.
A young girl who was no good at tennis
But at swimming was really a menace
Took pains to explain,
"It depends how to train;
I was a streetwalker in Venice."
A pious young lady named Finnegan
Would caution her beau, "Now you're in again,
Please watch it just right
So you'll last through the night,
For I certainly don't want to sin again."
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