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Today's jokes [9.25.09]

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This aussie caught this Kiwi having a bit of fun with a sheep.....

"Mate", the aussie said, "Over there we shear them".
The kiwi replied, "Mate, I'm not shearing this with innyone"

1. 




A mother was teaching her three year old daughter The Lord's 
Prayer. For several evenings at bedtime, she repeated it after 
her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The 
mother listened with pride, as she carefully enunciated each 
word right up to the end..."And lead us not into temptation", 
she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."

2. 




A young lady asked the Scotsman what he wore under his kilt.
"Reach up there and find out."
She did, but quickly pulled her hand back out and said, "Oh, it's 
gruesome!"
"Aye, it has," replied the Scotsman, "and if you put your hand back
up there, it'll grow some more!"

3. 




How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Four. Actually, only one to screw it in.
The other 3 are there to listen to him
brag about the screwing part! 

4. 




What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?

Your Honor.

5. 



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