Today's stories [8.22.09]

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When asked by the Pope (I forget which one) what the Catholic Church
could do for music, Igor Stravinsky is reputed to have answered without
hesitation: "Give us back castrati!" 

When my husband and I were living in Memphis we ordered Duck
Breast from the local 5 star restaurant.  I like my duck
cooked rare, so I inquired, 'would that be rare duck?' The
waiter replied, 'No, it's just a regular  old duck -- local,
I think.'

The police arrested a guy who claimed his name was Marvin Fuckbreak.  They
phoned his place of employ to ensure that was really his name.  The 
officer said "Do you have a Fuckbreak there?"   The person on the other 
end said "Hell no, we don't even get a coffee break!"

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