Today's jokes [8.14.09]
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A young woman on a rough Atlantic crossing was in her cabin undressing
then suddenly she was overcome by sea sickness. In a panic she rushed
into the corridor and headed for the bathroom. It was not until she
collided with an elderly gentleman that she realized she didn't have a
stitch of clothing on.
Horrified, she let out a shriek.
Her fellow sufferer looked at her sadly. "Don't let it bother you,
miss," he moaned. "I'll never live to tell anyone."
Do you know what happens if you don't pay your exorcist?
You get repossessed!
A rather well proportioned young lady, Joan, spent almost all of her
vacation sunbathing on the roof of the hotel.
She wore a bathing suit the first day but, on the second, being a
naturist, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she
slipped out of it for an overall tan.
She'd hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs. She was
lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear.
"Excuse me, miss," said the flustered little assistant manager of the
hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs.
"The hotel doesn't mind you sunbathing on the roof but we would very much
appreciate you wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday."
"What difference does it make," Joan asked rather calmly.
"No one can see me up here, and besides, I'm covered with a towel."
"Not exactly," said the embarrassed little man. "You're lying on the
dining room skylight."
What's the difference between a blonde and a shower?
The shower has to be turned on before it gets wet.
A somewhat drunk man feels a bald man's head and says, "Say, your head
feels just like my wife's ass."
The bald man feels his own head and says with a grin, "You know, you're
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