Today's quotes [7.31.09]

Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.

* It is true that love is blind but marriage is definitely an
       eye-opener.

Beginning in February 1976 your assistance benefits will be
   discontinued... Reason: it has been reported to our office that you
   expired on January 1, 1976.
   -- Letter from the Illinois Department of Public Aid

I always turn to the sports page first, which record people's
accomplishments. The front page has nothing but man's failures. 

     - Chief Justice Earl Warren 

New York... when civilization falls apart, remember,
we were way ahead of you.

David Letterman

Shin - Device for finding furniture in the dark.

By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Poems Today's Funny Pic   July '09 Quotes Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31