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Today's poems [7.19.09]

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There was a young lady from Slough 
            Who said that she didn't know how. 
                Then a young fellow caught her 
                And jolly well taught her; 
            She lodges in Pimlico now. 


Bill Clinton's no man of conviction, 
               Avoiding truth is a lifelong affliction. 
                    Mixes lies with the facts, 
                    We can never relax, 
               To him, truth IS stranger than fiction. 


A young sky diver named Sherm
jumped out with his cock long and firm
two jerks and a spasm,
he had an orgasm
and spelled out "I love you" in sperm.


            A big bollocksed dancer, Durango, 
            Had trouble while dancing Fandango, 
                The blood from his twirls 
                Overfilled the guys pearls 
            Which swelled to the size of a mango. 


To the tune of 'Yesterday':

Leprocy, bits and pieces falling off of me,
I'm not half the man I used to be,
Oh I contracted Leprocy.


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