Today's jokes [7.30.09]
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What do you call a 300 pound woman in Minnesota?
Stand with both arms outstreached level with your shoulders.
Ask: "what's this?" - A really crappy way to spend Easter.
What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit?
An old lady owned two monkeys. One day they both died,
so she took them to the taxodermist.
"So you want them mounted?" asked the taxidermist.
To which she replied: "No. Holding hands will do just fine."
Two friends meet each other on the street.
"Hello! Where are you coming from?" asked Bill.
"Oh, don't ask me! I'm coming from the cemetery.
I just burried my mother-in-law" replied Sid.
"I'm so sorry!" said Bill, "But why is your face schratched all over?".
"It wasn't so easy!" said Sid, "She put on a hell of a fight!"
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