Today's poems [6.19.09]

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               A young man from the banks of the Po 
               Found his cock had elongated so, 
                    That when he'd pee 
                    It was not he 
               But even his neighbors who'd know. 

A pathetic old maid of Bordeaux
Fell in love with a dashing young beau.
To entice his regard
She would squat in his yard
And appealingly piss in the snow. 

There was a young girl in Berlin 
               Who was fucked by an elderly Finn. 
                    Though he diddled his best, 
                    And fucked her with zest, 
               She kept asking, "Hey, Pop, is it in?" 

               There was an old soldier named Schmitt 
               Took a trip to the can for to shit. 
                    To his epic despair 
                    No paper was there. 
               So he simply continued to sit. 

Dirty Old Hag



Here's to Mag that dirty old hag,
That slick and slimy old bitch,
From her nose green matter flows,
And from her toes green maggots grow.
Before I climb those scaly legs
And chew those festered tits,
I'll drink three quarts of drunkard's puke
and die with the drizzled shits.

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