Today's poems [6.13.09]

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A gay prison chaplain named Locke
Had a passion for hard convict cock.
For his ass-holey ways
In his alcatraz days,
He was nicknamed the piece of the rock. 

On the plains of north-central Tibet 
               They've thought of the strangest thing yet: 
                    On the ass of a camel 
                    They pour blue enamel, 
               And bugger the beast while it's wet. 

Hey Masturbater
 
 (To The Tune Of Macarena) 
 
 Sitting in my house and I know that I'm alona, 
 Feeling kinda horny, got a jingle in my bona, 
 Go and grab a Penthouse it's the one with Sharon Stona,
 Hey Masturbata!!! 
 
 I go a little faster and it's feeling kind of nicea,
 Once is not enough so I have to do it twicea, 
 If you wanna spank the monkey I can give you good advicea,
 Hey Masturbata!!! 
 
 I use some baby oil or a little vaselina, 
 Laying down a towel so I keep my carpet cleana, 
 Never shake my hand cos you don't know where its beena,
 Hey Masturbata!!! 
 
 I do it in the car when I'm driving down the streeta,
 One hand on the wheel and the other on my meata, 
 I can't get out the car cos I'm sticking to the seata,
 Hey Masturbata!!! 
 
 Since I was a kid I have been a mastubater, 
 Choke the chicken, hum the knob, squeezing the tomata,
 I've looked at Miss November, now I'm gonna decorata,
 Hey Masturbata!!!! 


 Sent by Paul

There was a young fellow named Cribbs 
            Whose cock was so big it had ribs. 
                They were inches apart, 
                And to suck, it took art, 
            While to fuck, it took forty-two trips. 

The Camel

The sexual needs of a camel
are greater than anyone thinks.
For once in a moment of passion
it attempted to ravish the Sphinx.

The Sphinx's posterior entrance
was clogged by the sands of the Nile,
which accounts for the hump on the camel
and the Sphinx's inscrutable smile :)

Sent by FLG

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