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Today's jokes [6.24.09]

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Here's a lame one....

What is Homer Simpson's favorite ice cream?

Chocolate-chip cookie DOH!


   Father, mother and son decide to go to the zoo one day. So they set
   off and are seeing lots of animals. Eventually they end up opposite
   the elephant house. The boy looks at the elephant, sees its willy,
   points to it and says, "Mummy, what is that long thing?"
   His mother replies, "That, son, is the elephant's trunk."
   "No, at the other end."
   "That, son is the tail."
   "No, mummy, the thing under the elephant."
   A short embarrassed silence after which she replies, "That's nothing."
   The mother goes to buy some ice-cream and the boy, not being satisfied
   with her answer, asks his father the same question.
   "Daddy, what is that long thing?"
   "That's the trunk, son," replies the father.
   "No at the other end."
   "Oh, that is the tail."
   "No, no daddy, the thing below," asks the son in desperation.
   "That is the elephants penis. Why do you ask son?"
   "Well mummy said it was nothing," says the boy.
   Replies the father: "I tell you, I spoil that woman ..."


So my sister, a natural blond graduating from the University of 
North Carolina Law School, is job hunting. I suggested that 
since Microsoft is building up their legal team, she should send 
them a resume and become a southern blond Microsoft lawyer 

-- and be the butt of any joke on the internet.


Q: What is a blonde who died her hair brown?
A: Artificial Intelligence.


A tourist, visiting a small town in Israel, came upon a statue dedicated 
to "The Unknown Soldier". At the base of the statue, a sign was displayed: 
"Here lies Seymour Ruthenberg".
The tourist inquired of one of the locals how was it possible an unknown 
had a name.
The resident replied, "As a soldier, that Seymour was pretty much unknown, 
but as an accountant-Oy! He was something."


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