Today's jokes [6.17.09]
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One day a man and his dog walk into a bar. The owner of the
dog says to the bartender "I bet 10 dollars my dog can talk".
The bartender, naturally, accepts.
All of the sudden the dog starts reciting the Gettysburg adress.
So the bartender layes down ten dollars and the dog grabbs it
and runs out the door. The owner runs after the dog. He finds him
in a back ally (kissing) a french poodle. The owner says to his
dog "What are you doing? You've never done that before."
The dog responds: "I've never had ten dollars before."
What is the worst thing about our justice system?
You're leaving your fate in the hands of 12 people who
weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty!
What do chain saws and monkeys have in common?
They both fuck up trees!
The husband, tired of a listless sex life came right out and asked his
wife during a recent love-making session, "How come you never tell me
when you have an orgasm ?"
She looked him rite in the eye and said, "You're never home !"
What is Pink and Red and sits in a corner?
A baby with a razor blade.
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