Today's stories [5.11.09]

Vote for the story that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to story categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your story reading.

When two service station attendants in Ionia, Michigan,
 refused to hand over the cash to an intoxicated robber, the
 man threatened to call the police. They still refused, so
 the robber called the police and was arrested.

Redmond -- Citing the event as a new era of peace and cooperation, Bill 
Gates today announced Microsoft's purchase of Netscape.

Said Gates: "Hopefully now the world knows we're serious about the Web." 
Microsoft's first move will be to combine the two browsers, with the MINE 
(Microsoft Internet Netscape Explorer) browser due this year. "When we 
release this version," said Gates, "all Web access will be MINE."

[AP, Mammoth Lakes, CA] A San Anselmo man
   died yesterday when he hit a lift tower at the
   Mammoth mountain ski area while riding down the
   slope on a foam pad, authorities said. Matthew
   David Hubal, 22, was pronounced dead at Centinela
   Mammoth Hospital. The accident occurred about 3
   a.m. The Mono County Sheriff's Department said
   Hubal and his friends had apparently hiked up a
   ski run called Stump Alley and undid some yellow
   foam protectors from the lift towers. Lieutenant
   Mike Donnelly of the Mammoth Lakes Police
   Department said the pads are used to protect
   skiers who might hit the towers. The group
   apparently used the pads to slide down the ski
   slope and Hubal crashed into a tower. It has
   since been investigated that the tower he hit was
   the one with its pad removed.

By voting you are helping select today's best story. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best stories to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Poems Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   May '09 Stories Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31