Today's quotes [5.8.09]

Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.

* If quiters never win, and winners never cheat, then who is the
       fool who said "Quit while you're ahead"?

* Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

* If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an
       infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without
       even considering if there are men on base.
       -- Dave Barry

Education and intelligence aren't the same thing! 

Engineer: a person who knows a great deal about
very little and who goes along knowing more and
more about less and less, until finally he knows
practically everything about nothing. 

By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Poems Today's Funny Pic   May '09 Quotes Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31