Today's quotes [5.23.09]
Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
"Mine's proportionally longer than most."
-- Karen Peisley
"I was really worried, I've never seen you come so quickly..."
-- Angela Randall
"God wanted to have a holiday, so He asked St. Peter for suggestions on
where to go.
'Why not go to Jupiter?' asked St. Peter.
'No, too much gravity, too much stomping around,' said God.
'Well, how about Mercury?'
'No, it's too hot there.'
'Okay,' said St. Peter, 'What about Earth?'
'No,' said God, 'They're such horrible gossips. When I was
there 2000 years ago, I had an affair with a Jewish woman, and they're
still talking about it.'"
"Yeah I know, I don't have the big one though..."
"Satan is my sad... pathetic... knob."
-- Alasdair McLellan
By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
3 4 5 6 7 8 9
10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23
24 25 26 27 28 29 30