Today's quotes [5.16.09] Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
"We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming." - Wernher von Braun
One time I went to a museum where all the work in the museum had been done by children. They had all the paintings up on refrigerators.
I went to the cinema, and the prices were: Adults $5.00, children $2.50. So I said, "Give me two boys and a girl."
Stealing a rhinoceros should not be attempted lightly.
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