Today's poems [5.9.09]

Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.

A girl who is bespectacled
She may not get her necktacled;
But safety pins and bassinets
Await the girl who fassinets.
   
                       --Ogden Nash

There was a young girl of Peru 
               Who had nothing whatever to do, 
                    So she sat on the stairs 
                    And counted cunt hairs--- 
               Four thousand, three hundred, and two. 

A lady on climbing Mount Shasta
Complained as the mountain grew vaster,
That it wasn't the climb
Nor the dirt nor the grime
But the ice on her ass that harassed her. 

There once was a monkey named Spunky,
Who was always referred to as chunky.
So he went on a diet,
He shouldn't have tried it.
He became anorexic and died.


Sent by Mike F.

There was a young girl from Seattle 
            Who got her kicks sucking off cattle, 
                'til a bull from the South 
                Popped a load in her mouth 
            That made both her ovaries rattle. 

By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   May '09 Poems Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31