Today's stories [4.30.09]

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A group of terrorists burst into the conference room at the 
Ramada Hotel, where the American Bar Association was 
holding its Annual Conventions. More than a hundred lawyers 
were taken as hostages. The terrorist leader announced that 
unless their demands were met, they would release one 
lawyer every hour. 

A survey by cosmetics firm Avon revealed that British women 
would rather iron than have sex in the morning.  I've visited 
Britain, and I've got an even better idea for British men and 
women: how about *brushing your teeth* in the morning? 

Several years ago, we had an intern who was none too
swift. One day she was typing and turned to a
secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper.
What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the
secretary told her. With that, the intern took her
last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

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