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Today's poems [4.25.09]

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There once was a lady from Pinner
Whose boyfriend wanked on her dinner
She said if you please
I don't mind some cream teas
But I like my white sauce a bit thinner 


            Whenever a fellow named Rex, 
            Flashed his very small organ of sex, 
                He always got off, 
                For the judges would scoff, 
            De minimis non curat lex. 


Said the whore whom they called Geraldine,
"When I think of the pricks that I've seen,
And all of the nuts
And the arseholes and butts
And bastards like you in between." 


There once was a gal named Lewinsky
   Who played on a flute like Stravinsky
   'Twas "Hail to the Chief"
   on this flute made of beef
   that stole the front page from Kaczynski.



There was a young fellow from Sparta,
A really magnificent farter,
On the strength of one bean
He'd fart God Save The Queen,
And Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata. 


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