Today's poems [4.16.09]

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A clever inventor named Krupp 
            Wore a belt when he wanted to tup. 
                His mighty dry cells 
                Made her tits buzz like bells, 
            And lighted the hall-entrance up. 

A gallant young Frenchman named Grandhomme 
            Was attempting a girl on a tandem. 
                At the height of the make 
                She slammed on the brake, 
            And scattered his semen at random 

A poll conducted among INFOCUS magazine readers had established "waka" as the proper 
pronunciation for the angle-bracket characters (<), though some readers held out resolutely 
for "norkies." In honor of computer symbology's increased role in our vocabulary, INFOCUS 
published the following poem , written by Fred Bremmer and Steve Kroese of Calvin College & 
Seminary of Grand Rapids, MI.

>> ! * ' ' #
^ " ` $ $ -
! * = @ $ _
% * < > ~ # 4
& [ ] . . /
| { , , SYSTEM HALTED

The poem can only be appreciated by reading it aloud, to wit:

Waka waka bang splat tick tick hash,
Caret quote back-tick dollar dollar dash,
Bang splat equal at dollar under-score,
Percent splat waka waka tilde number four,
Ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash,
Vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma CRASH.

Ladies and gentlemen hoes and tramps

crosseyed buzzards and bowlegged ants

admission is free so pay at the door

pull up a chair and set on the floor

one night mid day two boys went to play

back to back brother to brother they

both drew a sword and shot each other

one deaf police officer who heard the noise

came and killed the two dead boys

if you dont believe this lie is true

just ask the blind man he saw it too.

sent by billbob

There once was a bishop from Nottingham 
            Who stood on a bridge down in Birmingham. 
                He watched all the stunts 
                Of the cunts in the punts 
            And the tricks of the pricks that were fucking
            them. 

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