Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page  
 


Today's quotes [3.19.09]

Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.


"All I'm saying is that you're deluded, pathetic, and squirrels use your
 head to store chestnuts for the cold winter months in."

-- Pinback, oz#gothic


1. 




"I wandered into a place in San Antonio which had what looked like a magnum
 of tabasco sitting in front of the counter.

 Me: 'I want!  I want!  I want!  I want!'.
 Sales dude: 'It's not for sale'.
 Me: 'Bowel movement'[0].

 [0] Or words to that effect."

-- Peter Gutmann, alt.sysadmin.recovery


2. 




It's not hard to tell we was poor -- when you saw the toilet paper
   dryin' on the clothesline.
         George Lindsey


3. 




Never moon a werewolf.
         Mike Binder


4. 




If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by
   candlelight.
         George Gobel


5. 



BONUS! A random quote from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD





By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read

Today's Jokes
Today's Stories
Today's Poems
Today's Funny Pic

 March '09 Quotes Issues:
S  M  T  W  Th F  St
                  1  
2  3  4  5  6  7  8  
9  10 11 12 13 14 15 
16 17 18 19 20 21 22 
23 24 25 26 27 28 29 
30 31 

Jump to  



For any questions or comments email us at info@jokes2go.com
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.