Today's poems [3.16.09]

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Three things are certain

Death, taxes, and lost data.

Guess which has occurred.

There once was a girl named McGoffin 
            Who was diddled amazingly often. 
                She was rogered by scores 
                Who'd been turned down by whores, 
            And was finally screwed in her coffin. 

               There was an old scholar named Nick 
               Who wrote Latin and Greek with his prick. 
                    He peed a paean 
                    In the snow by the john 
               In script more than three inches thick. 

Brian is an idiot!
 And everybody knows
 When he goes to bed at night
 He puts polish on his toes

 Brian is so stupid
 He sucks himself all day
 And when I went to a farm once
 And saw him eating hay

 Brian is a numbskull
 He loves a girl named Jade
 And he wanted her to kiss him so much
 Once he even paid

               There was a young colonel from Trent 
               Who lived in a lavender tent. 
                    He said that some sessions 
                    With interesting Hessians 
               Had taught him what war really meant. 

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