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Today's poems [3.13.09]

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A Turk by the name of Haroun
Ate whisky by means of a spoon
To one who asked why
This turk made reply:
"To drink is forbidden, you loon."

1. 




There was a young lady named Alice,
Who used dynamite for a phallus.
They found her vagina
In North Carolina,
And part of her asshole in Dallas.



2. 




               The Rajah of Afghanistan 
               Imported a Birmingham can, 
                    Which he set as a throne 
                    On a great Buddha stone--- 
               But he crapped out-of-doors like a man. 

3. 




There was a young girl named Maxine 
            Who found a new use for the bean. 
                As a vaginal bearing 
                She found it long-wearing, 
            And it varied her fucking routine.

4. 




Someone in Winslow, Maine didn't like Mr. Wood:

In Memory of Beza Wood
Departed this life
Nov. 2, 1837
Aged 45 yrs.
Here lies one Wood
Enclosed in wood
One Wood
Within another.
The outer wood
Is very good:
We cannot praise
The other.

5. 



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