Today's poems [2.21.09]
Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.
Modern Love Poem
A Trite Redundant Poem With a Laughable Excuse For a Structure
Addressed To Absolutely No One in Particular and Whose Only Redeeming
Value is That It's Short
a.k.a. A Modern Love Poem
My dearest darling with long dark hair and eyes azure,
My love for you is eternal, tried, and sure.
I stare into the infinite depths of your eyes,
But I often find my gaze directed at your thighs.
Everyone appreciates your unsurpassed beauty and grace,
Your perfect supple form and enchanting face.
Some say beauty is fleeting, and boy do I agree.
Your personality sucks, so when you're 40, with you I will not be.
My sweet, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways...
One...uh...one...hmm...number one...gimme a chance... how about the
way your body sways?
Let me once more restate my love for you.
65% of the time, to you I'm true.
There is no other woman with whom I lay,
At least, not at this particular time of day.
My dear, you're absolutely the best.
How 'bout accompanying me to the next Centralfest?
(That is, unless I don't have another date)
The events that brought us together must have been fate.
I love you, I love you, I love you.
You're the greatest, Jenny, I mean Cherry, I mean Sue.
There once was a lady from Hyde,
Who ate a green apple and died,
While her lover lamented,
The apple fermented,
and made cider inside her inside.
Once a pirate named Yates
Danced the jig for all of his mates.
He slipped in his cutlas,
And made himself nutless,
And now he's quite useless on dates.
There once was wee lad called Marvin
Who thought his big dick was for carvin'
He tried to cut slices
Of "Turkey with spices"
And left all his dining guests starvin'.
A young Juliet of St. Louis
On a balcony stood, acting screwy.
Her Romeo climbed,
But he wasn't well timed,
And half-way up, off he went---blooey!
By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's QuotesToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28