Today's jokes [12.23.09]

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Once in a medieval times, there was a King who was getting sort of bored after dinner one
night. He decided to hold a contest of who at the court had the mightiest "weapon". The
first knight stood up and proclaimed that he had the mightiest weapon...he pulled down his
pants and tied a 5 pound weight around it. The weapon doth rose. The crowds cheered...the
women swooned...the children waved multi-colored banners...and the band played appropriate
music.
Another knight stood up and yelled that he had the mightiest weapon. He dropped his pants
and tied a 10 pound weight to himself. The weapon doth rose. The crowds cheered...the
women swooned...the children waved multi-colored banners... and the band played
appropriate music.
After several more knights tried to prove their superiority...the King finally spoke out.
"I have the mightiest weapon of them all!" He dropped his pants and tied, not a 10 pound,
not a 20 pound, not ever a thirty pound, but a 40 pound weight to himself. The weapon doth
rose. The crowds cheered...the women swooned...the children waved multi-colored banners...
and the band played "God Save the Queen." 

Why is Chelsea Clinton growing up a confused child? 

Because dad can't keep his pants on and mom wants to wear 
them.

Sent by Nic

A kid at a sleep-away camp wrote home,
"Please send me some food. All they serve here are meals."

Where do you have to go to find a man who is truly into commitment?

A mental hospital.

What's the fastest way to get a nun pregnant?

Dress her up as an altar boy.

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