Today's stories [11.18.09]

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This one lady was telling the judge how her husband was 
abusive to her on several occasions and how fearful she was for 
her life.  She was seeking a restraining order.  The judge 
granted the order.  The bailiff asked if she needed an escort to 
her car, since her husband was in the courtroom with her. She 
said, 'No, he's my ride home.'

My friend was always teasing me about cybersex and trying
to lead me on.  One day he wrote a really racy letter so I 
decided to "call his bluff".  Forgetting I'd deleted his letter
out of  habit, I accidently responded to my Recipe Du Jour list
instead  and wrote:  "Thanks a lot.  Now I can't get any work
done.  My panties are wet from the anticipation of your next
email."  A gentleman wrote back:   "Sorry, I didn't realize
salsa had such an effect."

The re-release of George Lucas' "Star Wars" raked in millions.
"This came as a relief to Princess Leia who had fallen on hard
times and was considering becoming a spokeswoman for Weight
Watchers and Ocean Spray." (Joshua Sostrin)

Says Paul Ecker, "Teenagers all over the country are asking the
same question: Who's Mark Hamil?"

The film was enhanced with even more special effects. "In a
related move, Sweden will re-release Ingmar Bergman's films
"enhanced with even more gloom,'" (Michael Edens)

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