Today's quotes [11.13.09] Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
All I got for Christmas was a sweater... I would have prefered a screamer or a moaner.
Love thy neighbor, yet don't pull down your hedge. --Ben Franklin
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
"I'm convinced that, if you could decode the 'unused' bits of our DNA, they'd read: This is a test, please ignore or perhaps: The Elder Ones make no warranty of any kind with regard to this material, including, but not limited to, the implied warranties or merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose" -- Malcolm Ray, uhaa032@sun.rhbnc.ac.uk
I plugged my phone in where the blender used to be. I called someone. They went "Aaaaahhhh..."
By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30