Today's jokes [11.9.09]

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In a small Southern town there was a nativity scene that 
indicated great skill and talent in its creation. One small feature 
bothered me though. The three wise men were wearing 
firemen's helmets. 

Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left. 
At a "Quik Stop" on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind 
the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, 
yelling at me, "You darn Yankees never do read the Bible!" 

I assured her that I did, but simply couldn't recall anything 
about firemen in the Bible. She jerked her Bible from behind the 
counter and ruffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her 
finger at a particular passage. 

Sticking it in my face she said, "See, it says right here, 'The 
three wise men came from afar.'"

Why is a man at his smartest when he is having sex? 

     Because he's plugged into a woman! 

Q: What's the hardest thing about eating shaved pussy?
A: Putting the diaper back on.

A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day 
of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and 
a smile, gave him a broom and said, "Your first job will be to 
sweep out the store."

"But I'm a college graduate." the young man replied indignantly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that," said the manager. "Here, give 
me the broom, I'll show you how."

Two starving homeless men are walking down an empty street in a quiet town.
they spy a dead horse on the side of the road and run towards it. the first
man begins to eat the horse, but the second man refuses, saying only that he
will wait. after the first man has eaten his fill they continue on down the
road. eventually the first man gets sick from the horse meat and throws it
up. the second man pulls out a napkin from his pocket and exclaims as he
sits down: "now THIS is what i've been waiting for! a hot meal!"

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