Today's jokes [11.10.09]

Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.

What do you get when you play New Age music backwards?

     New Age music.

This guy owns a horse stud farm, and gets a call from a friend
"I know this midget with a speech impediment who wants to buy
a horse, I'm sending him over."
The midget arrives, and the owner asks if he wants a male or
female horse.
"A female horth," the midget replies.
So the owner shows him one.
"Nith looking horth, can I see thea her mouth?" 
So the owner picks up the midget and shows him the horse s mouth.
"Nith mouth. Can I see her eyesth?"
So the owner picks up the midget and shows the eyes.
"Ok, what about the earsth?"
Now the owner is getting pissed, but he picks up the midget one
more time and shows the ears.
"OK, finally, I d like to see her twat," said the midget.
With that, the owner picked up the midget and shoved his head up
the horse's twat, then pulled him out.
Shaking his head, the midget says, "perhapth I should rephrase.
I'd like to see her run!" 

Q. What do you call a musician without a significant other? 

               A. Homeless.

Age        WHAT'S THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED?
        17         17
        25         25
        35         35
        48         48
        66         66

Why wasn't Jesus born in America?

They couldn't find 3 wise men and a virgin.

By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Stories Today's Poems Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   November '09 Jokes Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30