Today's poems [10.10.09]

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Said Bill Clinton to young Ms. Lewinsky
   We don't want to leave clues like Kaczynski,
   Since you look such a mess,
   use the hem of your dress
   And wipe that stuff off of your chinsky.


  

               There was a young man from Jodhpur 
               Who found he could easily cure 
                    His dread diabetes 
                    By eating a fetus 
               Served up in a sauce of manure. 

There was a young lady named Gloria
Who had sex with Sir Wilfred DuMoria,
Then with 26 men,
Sir Wilfred again,
And the band from the Waldorf- Astoria.

To the tune of 'Yesterday':

Leprocy, bits and pieces falling off of me,
I'm not half the man I used to be,
Oh I contracted Leprocy.

               There was a young fellow named Chivy 
               Who, whenever he went to the privy, 
                    First solaced his mind, 
                    And then wiped his behind 
               With some well-chosen pages of Livy 

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