Today's jokes [10.19.09] Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.
Taylor was desperate for business, and was happy to be appointed by the court to defend an indigent defendant. The judge ordered Taylor, "You are to confer with the defendant in the hallway, and give him the best legal advice you can." After a time, Taylor re-entered the courtroom alone. When the judge asked where the defendant had gone, Taylor replied, "You asked me to give him good advice. I found out that he was guilty as hell, so I told him to split."
Two guys are susposed to meet at 4:30. Charley shows up at 4:30 and waits. Finally, at almost 5:00, Paul shows up and Charley says, "Where have you been? You're a 1/2 hour late." Paul replies, "Sorry, I had to go to the dentist. My dick's been hurting bad." Charley says, "If your dick's been hurting, why did you go to the dentist?" Paul answers, "Because I had a tooth stuck in it."
Part I: How do you keep a blond(e) busy? Give him/her a bag of M&Ms and ask her to alphabetize them. Part II: Why does that work? 'Does 3 come before E or between M and W?'
What do you call a man that marries another man? A minister
Two fags are on a picnic,and the first guy says,"I have to take a dumpski,"and he walks into the woods to do it. Several minutes later,the other guy hears the first guy crying "Boo Hoo,I Had A Miscarriage.I Had A Miscarriage." He runs into the woods to see what is going on. When he gets there,the first guy is still crying,"Boo-Hoo I Had A Miscarriage... He looks down and says,"Don't be silly.You didn't have a miscarraige.You had diarrhea on a toad."
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