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Today's poems [1.18.09]

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A habit uncouth and unsav'ry, 
               Kept the Bishop of Essex in slav'ry, 
                    Midst shrieks, hoots, and howls, 
                    He'd bugger large owls, 
               Which he kept in an underground av'ry.


There was young man named Pete
Who was a bit indiscrete.
He pulled on his dong
Till it grew very long
And actually dragged in the street 


Van Gogh found a whore who would lay, 
               And accept a small painting as pay. 
                    "Vive l' Art!" cried Van Gogh, 
                    "But it's too fucking slow--- 
               I wish I could paint ten a day!" 


Spam Haiku

Pink tender morsel,
Glistening with salty gel.
What the hell is it?


Ears, snouts and inards,
A homogeneous mass.
Pass another slice.


Old man seeks doctor.
"I eat SPAM daily", says he.


Highly unnatural,
The tortured shape of this "food":
A small pink coffin.

 - author unknown


There's a man in the Bible portrayed 
            As one deeply engrossed in his trade. 
                He became quite elated 
                Over things he created, 
            Especially the women he made. 


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