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Today's stories [9.30.08]

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There once was a conservative college in the mid-west that had 
a standing rule, the heat was not to be turned on in the 
dormitories prior to a certain date. 

Unfortunately, one year, winter decided to rear its ugly head 
early. Students in both the men's and women's dormitories 
complained about the bitter cold, but were told that nothing 
could be done. 

After days of no heat and no respite in immediate sight, the 
ladies realized that their dorm faced the equally cold men's 
dorm. They turned a bed sheet into a banner with the 
message,

"TURN ON THE HEAT OR WE'LL TURN ON THE BOYS!"

1. 




My brother was driving down the road that leads to 
you "Country Estate", all twenty acres of it. He saw a young person 
wearing a tee shirt and jeans walking along the side of the road 
and, as is to be expected in the rural areas of a few years past, 
offered this person a lift. The kid got in the car. Now, this was a 
bright, sunshinny day and my brother got a good look at the kid he 
picked up. He said "You live down this way, son?" The kid looked at 
my 50-year-old brother and asked "What's the matter, pops? Forget 
what a girl looks like?"

2. 




A Malaysian monkey that had been trained to gather
coconuts from trees demonstrated a pressing need for
a refresher course when it leapt onto the shoulders
of a passer-by in Kuala Lumpur and tried to twist
his head off. The passer-by was treated at a local
hospital for a sprained neck.

3. 



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