Today's stories [8.5.08]
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Wanted: Preparer of food. Must be dependable, like the food business, and
be willing to get hands dirty.
Illiterate? Write today for free help.
Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross
Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general
housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.
South Carolina: A man walked into a local police station,
dropped a bag of cocaine on the counter, informed the desk
sergeant that it was substandard cut, and asked that the
person who sold it to him be arrested immediately.
Modern parents believe toilet training should be an easy and
casual affair. Just let the child s*%# all over everything. This
prepares him or her for a brilliant career as a talk show host.
It used to be thought that children should act like "little
adults". Like many things that used to be thought, this is true. In
fact, now more than ever. Today's real adults are self-involved,
impulsive, inarticulate, and spend as much time as possible out
playing. They can't sit still, don't like to get dressed up, and hate
every kind of activity that requires self-restraint. Adults are the
children of today, and therefore children have to be adults because
there's only so much room in the world for kids.
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