Today's poems [8.27.08]

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There once was a man named Houdini,
Who spilled some Gin on his weenie.
Said his date, "How uncouth!".
So he poured on some Vermouth,
And slipped the young girl a martini!

Sent by NINA

               There was a young man from Aberdeen 
               Who invented a jerking machine. 
                    On the twenty-fifth stroke 
                    The goddamn thing broke 
               And beat his balls into a cream. 
                                                  

There was a young lady from Asia
Who shaved her legs with a razor
     One day she went high
     Right up past here thigh
And the gash it left would amaze ya!

There was a young sapphic named Anna 
            Who stuffed her friend's cunt with banana, 
                Which she sucked bit by bit 
                From her partner's warm slit, 
            In the most approved lesbian manner. 

Ladies and gentlemen hoes and tramps

crosseyed buzzards and bowlegged ants

admission is free so pay at the door

pull up a chair and set on the floor

one night mid day two boys went to play

back to back brother to brother they

both drew a sword and shot each other

one deaf police officer who heard the noise

came and killed the two dead boys

if you dont believe this lie is true

just ask the blind man he saw it too.

sent by billbob

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