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Today's poems [8.17.08]

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It was under the old apple tree 
               That she first showed it to me. 
                    It was ever so hot, 
                    It was shaped like a slot, 
               But it looked like a subway to me. 

               With a twinlke so full in her eye, 
               She craftily mangled my fly. 
                    Out popped a tool 
                    That was long as a rule 
               And she sank to her knees with a sigh. 

               She proceeded to lube up my tool 
               With lots of her natural drool. 
                    My knees gave a shake, 
                    My breath hard to make, 
               And my tool throbbed away like a fool. 

               With a magnificent shake of her head, 
               She threw me down onto the bed. 
                    The apples so round, 
                    The leaves on the ground 
               Made my tool like a sail on the Med. 

               The subway engulfed all my tool. 
               She rocked like she's riding a mule. 
                    My tool gave a jerk, 
                    Let out a hot squrt, 
               And flooded her subway with jooul. 

               As the sun sank slow in the west, 
               She rose up and off of my chest. 
                    The tool flopped out bent 
                    It was terribly spent-- 
               She absorbed all the best of the rest! 


A wide-bottomed girl named Trasket 
               Had a hole as big as a basket. 
                    A spot, as a bride, 
                    In it now, you could hide, 
               And include with your luggage your mascot. 


There was an old maid from Bruton 
               Who had the bad habit of pootin'. 
                    Her sphincter was weak, 
                    Her wind she couldn't keep--- 
               This tootin' old spinster from Bruton. 


               There was a young man from Hong Kong 
               Who had a trifurcated prong: 
                    A small one for sucking, 
                    A large one for fucking, 
               And a honey for beating a gong. 


There once was a kid named Darren
Who's room was surprisingly barren
He had no toys
Like all normal boys
But he did believe in sharing


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