Today's poems [8.14.08]

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There once was a girl named Miss Nokes, 
Who showed her behind to the folks. 
Everyone cheered, 
And a vendor appeared 
Selling hotdogs and popcorn and Cokes. 

               A vice both obscene and unsavory 
               Holds the Mayor of Southhampton in slavery. 
                    With bloodcurdling howls 
                    He deflowers young owls 
               Which he keeps in an underground aviary. 

               "Last night," said a lassie named Ruth, 
               "In a long-distance telephone booth, 
                    I enjoyed the perfection 
                    Of an ideal connection--- 
               I was screwed, if you must know the truth." 

A poll conducted among INFOCUS magazine readers had established "waka" as the proper 
pronunciation for the angle-bracket characters (<), though some readers held out resolutely 
for "norkies." In honor of computer symbology's increased role in our vocabulary, INFOCUS 
published the following poem , written by Fred Bremmer and Steve Kroese of Calvin College & 
Seminary of Grand Rapids, MI.

>> ! * ' ' #
^ " ` $ $ -
! * = @ $ _
% * < > ~ # 4
& [ ] . . /
| { , , SYSTEM HALTED

The poem can only be appreciated by reading it aloud, to wit:

Waka waka bang splat tick tick hash,
Caret quote back-tick dollar dollar dash,
Bang splat equal at dollar under-score,
Percent splat waka waka tilde number four,
Ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash,
Vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma CRASH.

There was a young fellow named Biddle 
               Whose girl had to teach him to diddle. 
                    She grabbed hold of his bow 
                    And said, "If you want to know, 
               You can try parting my hair in the middle." 

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