Today's quotes [7.8.08]

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I told my girlfriend last night how much I loved her,
and she said that I must have been out drinking again.
I asked her why she would say that, and she said,
"Because I'm your father." 

    - Dave George 

I love those slow-talking Southern girls. I was out with a Southern girl last night, took her so
long to tell me she wasn't that kind of girl, she was. 

    - Woody Woodbury 

"The male body is aerodynamic..."
"Yeah, it's got a keel."
"So what does that make a female? A catamaran?"
                        -- Amy, me, Heath Copeland

The United States has just recently signed an agreement
with Russia forbidding all nuclear weapons belonging to China. 

"I like the bestiality..."
                        -- Karen Peisley

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