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Today's poems [7.21.08]

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There was a young man of King's Cross,
Who amused himself frigging a horse.
Then licking the spend
Which still dripped from the end,
Said, "It tastes just like anchovy sauce."


There was a young lady from Kent,
When her husband's pecker it bent,
She said with a sigh,
"Oh, why must it die?
Let's fill it with Portland Cement." 


There once was a fellow named Clyde,
Who fell in an outhouse and died.
Along came his brother
Who fell in another,
And now they're interred side by side. 


               Any whore whose door sports a red light 
               Knows a prick when she sees one, all right. 
                    She can tell by a glance 
                    At the drape of men's pants 
               If they're worth taking on for the night. 


A Biblical party called Ham 
               Cried, "Cuss it, I don't give a damn! 
                    My father's yard measure 
                    I view with great pleasure, 
               Such a bloody great battering ram!" 


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