Today's jokes [7.9.08]

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Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.

Q: Why are women so bad at mathematics? 
A: Because men keep telling them that this
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is 12 inches. 

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked after folding items the woman wished to
purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I notice a remote control for a
television set in her purse. "Do you always carry your TV remote?" I 
asked.
"No," she replied. "But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I
figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him."

Joe, the neighborhood chronic borrower approached his 
neighbor, "Ray, may I borrow your axe?"  

"Not today," Ray replied, "I have to make soup."

"What kind of excuse it that?!" demanded Joe.  

"Well," confessed Ray, "I admit its a lousy excuse.  But, if I 
don't want to loan you my axe, one excuse is as good as 
another."

What's the difference between mono and herpes?

You get mono from from snatching a kiss.... 

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