Today's jokes [7.27.08]
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How can you tell if your date really digs oral sex?
She hikes up her skirt every time you yawn.
Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women?
When it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there.
Two guys get stuck on a desert island.They are soon caught by the natives
and brought to a village and put before the cheif.He says to the first
guy,"As punishment for tresspassing I give you a choice, death or Ru Ru".Not
wanting to die he picks Ru Ru.He is then beaten
and buggered to unconciousness right in front of his friend.The 2nd guywhen
asks says "I'd rather die than suffer that ". The chief says "Great,death it
is,death by Ru Ru"!!!
A guy is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products.
At the first stop, he is shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle
nipples. The machine makes a loud "hiss-pop" noise. "The hiss is the rubber
being injected into the mold," explains the guide. "The popping sound is
the needle poking a hole in the end of the nipple."
Later, the tour reaches the part of the factory where condoms are
manufactured. The machine makes a "Hiss. Hiss. Hiss. Hiss-pop" noise. "Wait
a minute!" says the man taking the tour. "I understand what the 'hiss,
hiss,' is, but what's that 'pop' every so often?"
"Oh, it's just the same as in the baby-bottle nipple machine," says the
guide. "It pokes a hole in every fourth condom."
"Well, that can't be good for the condoms!"
"Yeah, but it's great for the baby-bottle nipple business!"
I've got trouble with the wife again - she came into the bar
looking for me and I asked for her number.
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