Today's jokes [7.27.08] Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.
How can you tell if your date really digs oral sex? She hikes up her skirt every time you yawn.
Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women? When it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there.
Two guys get stuck on a desert island.They are soon caught by the natives and brought to a village and put before the cheif.He says to the first guy,"As punishment for tresspassing I give you a choice, death or Ru Ru".Not wanting to die he picks Ru Ru.He is then beaten and buggered to unconciousness right in front of his friend.The 2nd guywhen asks says "I'd rather die than suffer that ". The chief says "Great,death it is,death by Ru Ru"!!!
A guy is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products. At the first stop, he is shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle nipples. The machine makes a loud "hiss-pop" noise. "The hiss is the rubber being injected into the mold," explains the guide. "The popping sound is the needle poking a hole in the end of the nipple." Later, the tour reaches the part of the factory where condoms are manufactured. The machine makes a "Hiss. Hiss. Hiss. Hiss-pop" noise. "Wait a minute!" says the man taking the tour. "I understand what the 'hiss, hiss,' is, but what's that 'pop' every so often?" "Oh, it's just the same as in the baby-bottle nipple machine," says the guide. "It pokes a hole in every fourth condom." "Well, that can't be good for the condoms!" "Yeah, but it's great for the baby-bottle nipple business!"
I've got trouble with the wife again - she came into the bar looking for me and I asked for her number.
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