Today's poems [6.18.08]
Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.
DR. SUESS ON PCS
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
and the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
and the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
and your data is corrupted 'cause the index doesn't hash,
then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna crash!
If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
but your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
and you screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss,
so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse,
then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
'cause as sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang!
When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy on the disk,
and the microcode instructions cause unnecessary risk,
then you have to flash your memory, and you'll want to RAM your ROM.
Quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your mom.
Copyright © Gene Ziegler
There was a young man in Norway,
Tried to jerk himself off in a sleigh,
But the air was so frigid
It froze his balls rigid,
And all he could come was frappe.
In the quaint English village of Worcester
Lived a little red hen and a rooster.
A coquettish glance
She acquired in Framce
Gave him ants in his pants, and he goosed her.
NOW I LAY ME DOWN TO SLEEP
WITH THE BOY ACROSS THE STREET
WONT MY DADDY BE DISGUSTED
ONCE HE SEE'S MY CHERRY'S BUSTED
AND WONT MY MOMMY BE SURPRISED
WHEN SHE SEE'S MY BELLY RISE
Sent by JESSICA
On a bridge overlooking a ravine
Archibald was screwing Kathleen.
The force of his lunge
Caused the whole bridge to plunge.
The worst fucking disaster yet seen.
By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's QuotesToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28