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Today's stories [5.25.08]

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England: A German "tourist," supposedly on a golf
holiday, shows up at customs with his golf bag.
While making idle chatter about golf, the customs
official realizes that the tourist does not know
what a "handicap" is. The customs official asks the
tourist to demonstrate his swing, which he does --
backward! A substantial amount of narcotics was found
in the golf bag. 


When we were looking to buy property I had this over zealous 
realtor show us what can only be described as a totally worn-
out old farm. I mean the land had just been worked to death. 
The weeds were hardly even growing. 

The smiling super salesman said, "Now really, all this land 
needs is a little water, a nice cool breeze and some good 

I replied, "Yeah, I agree, but couldn't the same be said of Hell?"



At a good-bye lunch for an old and dear coworker who
is leaving the company due to "downsizing" our manager spoke up
and said, "This is fun. We should have lunch like this more
often."  Not another word was spoken. We just looked at each
other like deer staring into the headlights of an approaching truck.


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