Today's poems [5.28.08]

Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.

All those Monica limericks are lame, 
               But I guess we have Clinton to blame. 
                    Had he fucked just his wife, 
                    For once in his life, 
               Or at least missed the dress when he came. 

                    A hermit who had an oasis
                            
                    Thought it the best of all places:
                            He could pray and be calm
                            'Neath a pleasant date-palm,
                            
                    While the lice on his ballocks ran races.
                            
                                              

Doc said i should go on a diet;

I said, "Ok, I will try it."

But when i saw how

Much food he'd allow,

I made up my mind not to buy it.

Sent by Christi

There was a young man named McNamiter 
               With a tool of prodigious diameter. 
                    But it wasn't the size 
                    Gave the girls a surprise, 
               But his rhythm---iambic pentameter. 

Tombstone Epitaph In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:
Here lays Butch,
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger,
But slow on the draw.

By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   May '08 Poems Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31