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Today's poems [5.27.08]

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               I sat next to the Duchess at tea. 
               It was just as I feared it would be: 
                    Her rumblings abdominal 
                    Were simply phenomenal, 
               And everyone thought it was me. 


Mary had a little lamb (The sad European version)

Mary had a little lamb,
its coat was full off fleas,
but even worse the little cunt
had foot and mouth disease.

Mary had a little lamb,
its mouth was full of blisters,
but now its on a bonfire,
with all its brothers and sisters.

Sent by Jack


There was a young man of Tyburnia 
               Who was fucking a girl with a hernia. 
                    When he shot in her twat 
                    Why, she also shot--- 
               All over him! Wouldn't that burn ya? 


Part 5 of 12
                    He was great in the Christmas Cantata,
                    He could double-stop fart the Toccata,
                            He'd boom from his ass
                            Bach's B-Minor Mass,
                    And in counterpoint, La Traviata.


There was a young lady called Bright 
Who could travel much faster than light 
she departed one day
in a relative way 
And arrived on the previous night


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