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Today's poems [5.18.08]

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There was a young lassie named Phyllis 
               Was deflowered one night in a Willys. 
                    Before they were through 
                    Her spine was askew, 
               And I very much fear that it still is. 


There was a young woman of Croft
Who played with herself in a loft.
Having reasoned that candles
Could never cause scandals,
Besides which they did not go soft. 


There was a young fellow from Wark, 
                                        Who, when he screws, has to bark. 
                                                      His wife is a bitch, 
                                                      With a terrible itch, 
                                        So the town never sleeps after dark. 


The National Anthem of Windows Nation

 In honor of the new Windows Flag above the corporate campus:

           OLE can you C, by the fonts of TrueType,
       What so proudly we mailed to our users upgrading?
  Whose class libs and tool bars, through the marketing hype,
    Four meg RAM cards they'd bought, final beta awaiting.
      And the testers declare, fix the bugs on the share,
        Codeview'd every byte of our way cool software.
         Oh, say does that user friendly icon yet wave
                   O'er the land of the GUI,
                 and the Windows of the brave.

                                   copyright (c) 1992, Bogus Music
                                   lyrics, deanb
                                   inspiration, stevesh


                    There was a young man of Loch Leven
                    Who went for a walk about seven.
                            He fell into a pit
                            That was brimful of shit,
                    And now the poor bugger's in heaven.


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