Today's jokes [5.19.08]

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Magnussen goes to a marriage counselor and says, "My wife isn't as much 
fun as she used to be."
The marriage counselor says, "Do you still enjoy a roll in the hay?"
Magnussen says, "As much as the next fellow."
The counselor says, "Maybe between you and the next fellow, she's 
exhausted." 

What do you get when you cross a Rooster with an owl?

A Cock that can stay up all night!!

A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist.
The doctor took one look at this woman and all his
professionalism went out the window. 
He immediately told her to undress. After she had
disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. Doing
so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing?" 
"Yes," she replied, "you're checking for any abrasions
or dermatological abnormalities." "That is right," said
the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do
you know what I'm doing now?" he asked.
"Yes," the woman said, "you're checking for any lumps or
breast cancer." "Correct," replied the shady doctor.
Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual
intercourse with her. He asked, "Do you know what I'm doing
now?"
"Yes," she said. "You're getting herpes; which is why I came
here in the first place."

Two drunks sitting at the rural area bar, lamenting their lack of a sex 
life. One looks out the window, and across the road is a sheep stuck half 
way thru a fence, with its butt facing the tavern. One drunk says he sure 
wishes that sheep were Marilyn Monroe. The other says, "I just wish it 
were dark."

The medical student was asked four reasons why mother's
milk was better for babies than cow's milk. 
This is the answer he submitted: 
1. It's fresher. 
2. It's cleaner. 
3. The cats can't get to it. 
4. It's easier to take on a picnic. 
He also added: "It comes in such cute containers."  

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