Today's poems [4.22.08]

Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.

There was a young couple named Kelly               
               Who had to live belly to belly, 
               Because once, in their haste, 
               They used library paste 
               Instead of petroleum jelly. 

               There was a young lady named Ransom 
               Who was rogered three times in a hansom. 
                    When she cried out for more 
                    A voice from the floor 
               Said, "My name is Simpson, not Sampson!" 

A pancy who lived in Khartoum,
Took a  lesbian up to his room
And they argued all night
Over who had the right
To do what, and with which, and to whom.

There once was a man from Horton,
Who had one long ball and one short one,
To make up for his loss,
He had a cock like a hoss,
And could fart like a 650 Norton.

Sent by Dale

               My wife Myrtle's womb has a habit 
               Of expanding whenever I stab it. 
                    What's more, my wife Myrtle 
                    Is so wonderously fertile, 
               That she's giving me kids like a rabbit. 

By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   April '08 Poems Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30