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Today's poems [4.2.08]

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There was an old hag named Le Sueur 
            Who just was an out-and-out whore. 
                Between her big tits 
                You could come for two bits, 
            And she'd fuck in any old sewer. 

1. 




                              Modern Love Poem
     
   
      A Trite Redundant Poem With a Laughable Excuse For a Structure
  Addressed To Absolutely No One in Particular and Whose Only Redeeming
                          Value is That It's Short
                         a.k.a. A Modern Love Poem

My dearest darling with long dark hair and eyes azure,
My love for you is eternal, tried, and sure.
I stare into the infinite depths of your eyes,
But I often find my gaze directed at your thighs.

Everyone appreciates your unsurpassed beauty and grace,
Your perfect supple form and enchanting face.
Some say beauty is fleeting, and boy do I agree.
Your personality sucks, so when you're 40, with you I will not be.

My sweet, how do I love thee?  Let me count the ways...
One...uh...one...hmm...number one...gimme a chance... how about the
way your body sways?

Let me once more restate my love for you.
65% of the time, to you I'm true.
There is no other woman with whom I lay,
At least, not at this particular time of day.

My dear, you're absolutely the best.
How 'bout accompanying me to the next Centralfest?
(That is, unless I don't have another date)
The events that brought us together must have been fate.

I love you, I love you, I love you.
You're the greatest, Jenny, I mean Cherry, I mean Sue.
  


2. 




There once was a woman from Niczes
Whose breasts were two different sizes
One it was small
It was nothing at all
The other was large and won prizes

Sent by karen

3. 




To Italy went Sinclair Lewis 
               Documenting the life led by loose 
                    American drunks, 
                    But he unpacked his trunks 
               'Cause Florence slipped him a goose. 

4. 




A horrid old lady of Summit, 
               Every time she got laid had to vomit, 
                    And although she would groan 
                    When her man got a bone, 
               "Give it here," she would say, "and I'll gum it!" 

5. 



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